What I'm Into-September 2013

Here's a fun thing. A new-to-me blogger, Leigh Kramer, hosts this link-up for people to share what they read, listened to, ate, and otherwise engaged in for the previous month. So if you're at all interested in what I did in September, stick around! Otherwise, you know, um, don't. Or something.

Happenings

• September was full of happy events. As I posted here, we finalized our daughter's adoption on September 3rd, a mere two weeks after moving across the country. 

• Ricky turned the big 3-0 and we celebrated with dinner, presents, and a salted caramel cheesecake. In the spirit of youth, I surprised him with tickets to go see Macklemore in November. Maybe we'll feel silly, but it should be fun. I'm on the lookout for a babysitter starting now. 

• Nicolas turned seven. It was a little sad to not have the usual friends and family around to celebrate with a big party like usual, but he took it in stride. We made the day special with lots of balloons, a special breakfast, funfetti cake (hurts my teeth to just think about it), a new bike with NO training wheels, opening packages he'd received in the mail from family, and a fun night at his school carnival (it also happened to be his school's 40th anniversary that day.) The next day was Saturday so we took a trip to the Lego store. It was actually not huge like we thought it would be, and therefore a bit anticlimactic for the adults, but he loved it.

• We joined a gym that offers two hours of childcare daily. We're mostly alternating days, but we did have a "work-out date" on Saturday. I was so beat afterward that I had to take a nap. Aaaand that's what I get for working out with Ricky. It was fun though.
• Silas, Aimee and I are staying home quite a bit. I'm not planning on looking for a nursing job until January, so this is a nice break. I'm still spending a lot of time unpacking and "cozifying" the house, and we frequent the neighborhood parks and head out to the gym a few mornings a week. Our schedules revolve around naps. It's simple and sweet, and I can actually appreciate it because it's temporary (funny how that works.)

• We've been to three churches here, two of which are promising. I'll share more about that in the coming days, as we figure things out. 

Reading

• I read Nadia Bolz-Weber's new book Pastrix: The Cranky, Beautiful Faith of a Sinner and Saint. It was refreshing to read something both gritty and vulnerable, and I came away from it encouraged in my faith. As Nadia writes, Christianity is really just a continuous process of death and resurrection, rather than a ladder we climb. It's freeing to think in those terms. I also really enjoyed listening to her interview with Krista Tippett, particularly the part where she discusses her tattoos and their meanings, and notes that tattoos often carry with them a profound story or hard-won truth. My one tattoo (the second one is brewing, I think) came from my years of grief following my father's passing and the desire to hold onto God's goodness. It's a hope really, more than an assurance. It sure is difficult to explain to curious passers-by in one or two lines! Anyway, I suppose I'm deeply curious about why people get the tattoos that they do, so this was fascinating to listen to.

• I'm still plugging away at America's Women: Four Hundred Years of Dolls, Drudges, Helpmates, and Heroines by Gail Collins. It's truly interesting material, but I suppose my brain is easily pulled away by social media and such after a bit of reading in this book. It's a good one for my nightstand.

• I just started All is Grace: A Ragamuffin Memoir by Brennan Manning with John Blase (whose poetry I've really come to look forward to.) This one's been on the list for a while. 

Listening

• I've mostly been listening to Over the Rhine's new album Meet Me at the Edge of the World. It's my favorite work of theirs so far. Their music is gorgeous as usual, but there's a sense of peace and groundedness to this album that's really special, in contrast to the tensions they expressed in previous albums. We saw them in Albuquerque in 2010, and I remember they talked about how so many are interested in the stories of how people meet and fall in love, but they were more interested in the stories of what happens after people are married. It's infinitely more meaningful to hear happy stories when people have shared their sad and confusing times as well. All that to say, I sure like them.

• I'm a big fan of Jonathan Martin's sermon podcasts, and often listen to them while getting stuff done around the house. Thank God for my internet pastors :)

Eating

• I was curious about the cauliflower pizza crust I see everywhere, so we tried it out last Friday night. It's so, so good! I used this recipe.

• I'm enjoying fall-ish recipes. Chili in the crockpot, roasted acorn squash with taco meat and melted cheese, butternut squash lasagna....you get the idea. 

• Yesterday I discovered this little gem. It's every bit as good as it looks.

Watching

• Breaking Bad, along with most everyone else. A few years back I watched an episode and a half with Ricky and decided it wasn't for me because of the violence. At some point though, the story drew me in and I've been watching it religiously since. I did see the final season including the series finale before I finished all the in between episodes, so it's all a bit of a mishmash in my head. I think I like it as much as I do, despite the violence and difficult subject matter, because the characters are so layered and remind me of people I know in real life. To me, that's one of the marks of a well-written show.

• I also have big plans to start season 4 of Downton Abbey now that Walter White and I are parting ways. Ricky and I like to keep up with The Voice on Hulu and I'll be checking in with Parenthood at some point. Yay for new fall shows to watch.

So that's September in a nutshell. What did you enjoy (or not enjoy)? Linking up with Leigh here.

Happy October!

we settle in

So, we moved. Very far from New Mexico. It occurs to me that Ricky and I are very good at jumping off of cliffs. Foster care felt like a cliff, like a hold-hands-and-jump endeavor. This move feels a bit like that too. But, it's pretty important to note that prior to our cliff-jumping shenanigans, we talk about whether or not we should jump for a long while. Years, typically. I don't know if that still counts as spontaneous, but it certainly feels that way. The whole should we move conversation's been happening since Nicky was a baby, but never really took form until the summer. I believe in keeping inventory of dreams, lining them up on shelves, dusting them off occasionally, putting them back, and when the time is right taking them down. The tricky part is knowing when the time is right. This dream just felt more and more right.

So here we are. It's September and already chilly; we bookend the days with jackets. There are crunchy leaves and hidden parks and forest trails. There's the thrill of something new and the ache of not having our people around to share it with.

Routine helps. There's a sweet neighbor who calls me baby (as in, hey there baby, you gettin' yourself together? and before I can really answer she assures me that's all right, it takes time) and we've tried a few churches. Sometimes all the newness is exciting, and sometimes I just want to hurry up and find our places here. 

Here are some pictures of our first weeks.

a little garden at Nicky's school

Silas loves "pitter-pillars" and unfortunately has discovered that stepping on them makes goo come out.

We have "lots of nature", Nicky says.

first day of second grade

taking Nicky to the bus stop

we spent a lot of time in our sweet little backyard

and this one loves to push all the things

My mom came to visit, and to stay with the boys while we finalized the adoption.

We all went to Washington DC a few times. I love that it's so close.

It wasn't until she left that the move started to feel real. We've had so much excitement in just the span of a month. Househunting, goodbyes, packing, the actual move, exploring a new town, unpacking, finalizing the adoption, my Mom's visit, new job for Ricky, new school for Nicky.....wow.  I've certainly needed some space and quiet to process it all.

Now, we settle in.

a sweet day

Introducing our daughter, Aimee Lucia. Arrived to our our home June 21, 2012, just six weeks old. Adopted on September 3, 2013, nearly sixteen months old. Daughter of our hearts all the way in between, and beyond.

Something you should know about Aimee is that she delights in removing frippery from her hair. And she has a mother who keeps trying with the frippery, because she can't help herself.

We gathered in a courtroom, and said our vows of sorts. We said out loud the promises we made long ago. When the judge said "hereby adopted" I held myself together, just barely. Then we were ordered to hug and kiss, and happy to oblige.

Sister got to be judge for a day. The gavel was a bit heavy, but I think she felt powerful nonetheless.

I can't imagine a more lighthearted, happy court event. Having my uncle serve as our attorney made it extra special.

Dear friends, social workers, and people who have just about carried us through parts of this journey gathered to witness. The room was full of pure joy. I'll never forget what that felt like. 

Aimee's personality is really shining through lately. She seeks out other "littles", and plays sneaky games, squeals and shrieks and throws her hands up, and bounces around to music. She and Silas are likely up to something if they're together. It's happy chaos.

                                    

And now we know she likes frozen yogurt.

                                        

All of this and more will be scribbled down into her baby book-the one I bought months ago but haven't yet cracked open. So much to say, so much to remember. I didn't really expect to feel different, but I do. I didn't realize I would sigh so deeply with relief and gladness.

*photos by Heath Haussamen

30.

We went out for dinner with friends and family the weekend after my 30th birthday, and it was so fun and special. Just a night out is a huge treat! Our friend recently sent this picture of Ricky's funny, sweet toast to me. I'm not usually one for birthday parties, but this was really lovely.

Thirty feels good so far.

(Posting will probably continue to be light until early June at least--I'm in an intense season of learning at work and a not-so-intense season of calm quiet at home. Both are much-needed, I think.)

slopes

This past weekend we surprised Nicky with an overnight ski trip. We've really been wanting to take him, and both of us had the weekend off.  We made arrangements for Silas and Little Miss, and picked up Nicky from school on Friday with the news. At first, he was a little bummed about "the babies" not coming along, but I think we convinced him of the logic of not taking them along. (I think.)

I confess I had some selfish motivations for this trip. I haven't been on skis since taking a nasty spill and fracturing my tibial plateau (top of the tibia) three years ago. I definitely had/have some fear and trepidation about the whole business. Taking Nicky turned out to be a good way to ski a little and face a pretty major fear while keeping things light on the easy slopes. 

I can't explain why exactly, because I'm perfectly fine being afraid of or just not doing some things 

(skydiving, rock-climbing, running a marathon, attempting to knit again) but I really want to ski. I 

want to have something our family can go and do all together, especially as the kiddos get older (even if they don't want to be seen with their nerdy parents).

It's an obvious metaphor of course, but this really is how I want to live my life.  I want to figure out which things matter to me and face the fear, rational or otherwise, that would keep me from doing them.

So, we did it. I took it super easy, and the lifts still freak me out (I have a slightly irrational moment of sheer terror every time I have to get off of one, and have to give myself little pep talks. I think I might have actually said out loud "You'll be fine. Just lean forward and do your pizza," to myself at least once. Ha!) Nicky, however, sailed right through. He spent a few hours learning the basic balance stuff without poles, and got the hang of it much faster than we expected. I can really see the value of learning these types of things as a child. Oh, and being the oh-so-humble child he is, he pronounced himself a better skier than me about halfway through the day....this was after I gushed about how fast he was learning, and how much longer it had taken me to learn. This boy....

Toward the end of the day, we rode the gondola up to the top of the mountain. I loved seeing the less populated parts of the mountain, where it's quiet and foggy, and you just hear the sound of people's skis and snowboards in the snow. At the bottom, where so many people are learning, there's loud music playing and people falling everywhere, and you can sort of feel the anxiety in the air. Up at the top, it just feels peaceful. I got a small sense of the joy of skiing before I hurt myself. I crave that feeling again; that simple joy.

Nicky was predictably exhausted by the late afternoon. I'm so happy it was a fun experience for him, and I'm glad I stared down the fear monster.  I still have some work to do in that department, but this was a huge first step.

7 months old

Little Miss turned seventh months old on Wednesday.

She's had a rough week, this one. She got the virus that descended on our house, and despite our efforts to make her comfortable, looked pretty miserable. She's probably the easiest sick baby in history though, because she basically just slept when she wasn't eating. Thankfully, we're on the upward swing. I'd rather be sick myself any day than have a sick baby. There's no way to explain to them why everything is suddenly terrible.

In other news, she's rolling onto her tummy like a champ, and is thisclose to sitting up on her own. Wrapping the boppy pillow around her works really well. And, she sat in a restaurant highchair for the first time the other night, with my jacket filling in all the extra space.

She also had her first infant massage session yesterday, which she just barely tolerated, but we have another appointment next week that will hopefully go better when she's feeling normal again. The masseuse was very understanding, and Little Miss did seem to have a better day after that, so I think it helped.

It seems like things have slowed down a bit developmentally, but I keep remembering something my uncle said a few weeks ago--"it just means she gets to be a baby a little longer."

That is a thought that makes me smile. Happy 7 months baby!

Silas turns 2

Today Silas is two years old. He still has some baby in him, thankfully. I'm not ready for him to grow up yet! The Toddler is here though: all that cute baby-ness trying to find its way to Big Boy-ness. This morning he was lying next to me, snoozing away, then woke up suddenly, sat up in bed and said "Mommy. Papa. Bettis. Kay?" And climbed off the bed, saying "Laler!" as he shut the door behind him. Translation: Good morning, Mommy. I'm going to find Papa, because that's where the breakfast is. Okay? See you later! He makes me smile.

We celebrated on Saturday morning with friends and family (or "buddies" as he calls them). It was cloudy and cold, and we were cozy inside with brunch and various dog-themed activities.

his buddy from birth

The menu: egg casserole (the kind with bread baked in, soooo good), cheddar biscuits, apples and caramel sauce, coffee, cider and tea, and spice cake with cream cheese frosting.

Little Miss sported some doggie ears, but Nicky avoided wearing his. He's outgrowing such things I guess.

Silas ditched his costume early on and spent the rest of the party in his shirt and diaper....there are only so many birthdays you can do that and still be considered cute. He also showed off his wolf-howling skills, and blew out his candles like a champ.

Doggie cake, and The Knife. Oy.

Nicky made a birthday banner the night before, on his own initiative, with help from Grandma.

This was our first morning birthday party, and I liked it. Lots of work the day before, but the day of was all about enjoying company and then relaxing afterward. We watched Brave, and ate leftover Chinese food, and got lots of snuggles in. It was a perfect day to celebrate our little guy.

At age two, Silas is:

• affectionate
• charming (it works a little too well on me, and he knows it I think)
• stubborn and cranky, quite dependent on naps
• curious
• a lover of books, especially ones about animals
• good at making animal sounds
• navigating ipads and smart phones a little too well (his favorite app is Peekaboo Barn, and he can call Ricky from my phone with no assistance from me)
• talking a lot, repeating pretty much everything we say
• imitating Nicky, playing more like a big boy
• still quite an early riser
• getting pretty good at throwing and catching a ball (bouncy balls have not lost their magic)
• saying some fun words, like "mine", "now!", "candy" and of course the favorite "no".
• balancing all that out with some serious cuteness

What a delight he has been, and continues to be. Our Silas Nathaniel.